Over the recent holiday, I crumbled. My favorite business provider told me she closed her company doors. She provides a major service that helps my business give generously to my clients. Her decision left me in a lurch. I felt abandonment for my clients and myself. It sent me spiraling into the story of victimhood and unfairness (old stories from my past trauma).
I had a choice in that moment. I could avoid my feelings and keep busy, or I could stop what I was doing, support myself, and truly feel my emotions… cry, scream, stomp around, etc. But most importantly, hold myself while I felt those feelings. I let myself feel. Tears poured down my face. I curled into a ball. I processed the pain connected to my old story which says, “People always leave. I am not enough.”
There are times when that old story cycles back into my heroine’s journey. The spark of my childhood wound still lives in my body. To be clear, my younger self believed, “I don’t belong anywhere. I am not enough to be loved.” Growing up, my trauma-wounded-self sought evidence that I didn’t belong and I didn’t “measure up”.
As a trauma-recovered coach, I notice that when my adult self “avoids”, or shoves the story down, I actually give the old story life. I subconsciously feed that story when I pretend it doesn’t exist.
As I cried yesterday, I could feel myself cleansed by my tears. I could feel the old story dissipate a little more. I felt my human self connect more deeply with my soul self. I could feel spirit acknowledging me for doing the inner work to heal myself. My thoughts turned from impossible to possible once again. I remembered that I am a powerful creator and the future is what I make it.
Know This: Your thoughts create a ripple effect across your entire life.
Are you ready to practice? Want to uplift your inner dialogue and uplevel your outer patterns? Are you ready to reclaim your inner and outer worlds?
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